Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows
January 24th 2008 07:59
My name is J.K. Rowling and here is my book. It is a book for children. You are a child if you enjoy reading this book.
You will like my book. Voldemort. What a guy! He cause trouble and poor Hedwig and Mad-Eye Moody. No one likes them much anyway.
House elf. Horcrux. Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix, something, something. Sword is a fake! Amazing sequence of events! Broken wand, terrible loss. Doe patronus - wow!
Hallows that are deathly. Very complicated and not sure how it works. But they are very important! For some reason. Rob bank and get Cup. Terrific excitement.
Hogwarts! Fighting! Action! Amazing! What is a diadem? Harry must die? This plot. The excitement will overwhelm you.
Soul fragments, snake, a lot of characters who you don't care about are dead! The Elder Wand! A twist beyond compare! What is that?! Dumbledore! Amazing conclusion!
This is a book for children which a child could not possibly follow. If your child tells you that they read this book and they understood it, then you are raising a liar and you have failed as a parent - discipline your child! I'm a real live adult and this book barely makes sense. That's mostly because I can't recall the seven volumes of convoluted events leading up to the confusing and disorientating finale of the Harry Potter series and I put it to you that anyone who can is likely to be suffering from some kind of social problem.
If you are a virgin and enjoy spending time indoors (perhaps your room is located in a basement), then I would recommend this book!
You will like my book. Voldemort. What a guy! He cause trouble and poor Hedwig and Mad-Eye Moody. No one likes them much anyway.
House elf. Horcrux. Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix, something, something. Sword is a fake! Amazing sequence of events! Broken wand, terrible loss. Doe patronus - wow!
Hallows that are deathly. Very complicated and not sure how it works. But they are very important! For some reason. Rob bank and get Cup. Terrific excitement.
Hogwarts! Fighting! Action! Amazing! What is a diadem? Harry must die? This plot. The excitement will overwhelm you.
Soul fragments, snake, a lot of characters who you don't care about are dead! The Elder Wand! A twist beyond compare! What is that?! Dumbledore! Amazing conclusion!
This is a book for children which a child could not possibly follow. If your child tells you that they read this book and they understood it, then you are raising a liar and you have failed as a parent - discipline your child! I'm a real live adult and this book barely makes sense. That's mostly because I can't recall the seven volumes of convoluted events leading up to the confusing and disorientating finale of the Harry Potter series and I put it to you that anyone who can is likely to be suffering from some kind of social problem.
If you are a virgin and enjoy spending time indoors (perhaps your room is located in a basement), then I would recommend this book!
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Comment by Michaelie
Flick Wit
Michaelie
Comment by Pat
Books Are For Losers
Comment by Dianna G
I Wish This Was 42
Fictional Worlds
There was A character I had huge fondness for. Snape.
And he died. So HP is dead to me, as is JKR for writing that pc (Piece of Crap)
Comment by Anonymous
aimee
Comment by Luke
Book Club
Old Movies
Cane Toad Warrior
surprised there was no talk of Dumbledore's gayness in this blog though!